Debt - How to Stay Positive in Negative Circumstances

EFFECTS OF THE CREDIT CRUNCHsewing lavender bags (the flower heads harvested
Watching the UK's Channel 4 TV programmefrom the garden), and raiding the 'bit bag' for fabrics
Dispatches on the human cost of the credit crunchand trimmings to be made into any number of useful
was heartbreaking. First there was the man (Jamaican,and decorative items. It was, my industrious girls
I think) who'd worked all his life on the buses. Maskingdeclared, the best Christmas ever.
his emotion with a big, beaming smile, he told us that heGENEROSITY KNOWS NO BOUNDS
had never imagined that retirement would be soWe found, too, the truth of the axiom 'it is more
frightening. He indicated his gas and electrical bills. Theyblessed to give than receive'. Having always, in the
terrified him, he said.past, been the givers, we now had to accept with
Then there was the single mother, wanting to do whatgrace the generosity of others. And generous they
all mothers want - to give the best to her children. Shewere. Like the widow's cruse of oil in the Bible story,
was easy prey for the loan-sharks who convinced herwe never ran dry of gifts of food and toiletries which
that she could easily repay her loans and who, onceappeared, anonymously for the most part, in the
she neared doing so, convinced her that it would be incupboard, on the doorstep, or delivered by the local
her interest to take out another loan.grocer. Gifts of money arrived, as well. Sometimes
The divorced mother, who fled from her husband withfrom people we had never met. Friends of friends.
nothing but the clothes she and her children wereI had applied for help from what was, then, the DHS.
wearing at the time, was similarly exploited. TheBut the list of questions about being in receipt of 'gifts
£400 she borrowed was quickly consumed byin kind' made me have to think again. I couldn't, in all
the cost of school uniform. Whilst the mother whohonesty, say that I had received nothing. And to say
worked for the now bankrupt airline Excel, foundthat I had received something made me ineligible for
herself suddenly with no income, no money to feedfinancial help. I had phone calls from the Department,
herself and her children, and only a vague promise of aurging me to collect what I was 'due'. But I wasn't due
loan from Social Services.it, I told them. And even when they sent someone out
REVERSE MORTGAGE MARKETINGto see me, I stuck to my guns. To have done
All three women feared the loss of the property theyotherwise would have meant telling a lie.
had purchased, in order to create a home for theirALL GAIN AND NO PAIN?
children. But the worst, the most despicable treatment,It will be harder for the participants of Channel 4's
was meted out to a pensioner with Parkinson'sprogramme than it was for me. I was brought up in an
disease. Promised a lump-sum if she agreed to aera when being frugal was commendable - whatever
reverse-mortgage of the home she'd bought whenyour means. Today's mothers and children have been
widowed, and lovingly improved, she found that theled to believe by government, banks and credit card
amount she had been spending on her mortgage morecompanies that they can have it all, and have it all
than quadrupled in rent to the loan company. Wheninstantly; that it's all gain and no pain. The pain, for them
she was unable to meet the payments, her flat wasI fear, is just beginning. But I hope, I just hope, that they
repossessed. And when she asked for the arrears towill look back one day, as I have done, and find
be taken from the promised lump sum, she was toldsomething of value in the experience they're about to
that it was not payable for TEN years after thego through. They have my very best wishes that in
agreement. A swindle, if you ask me.the days ahead there will be something good in their
It made me so angry; distressed on behalf of ordinary,lives.
decent people. And it reminded me of my own plightCold, hunger and isolation are the enemies of anyone
when my children were young.going through tough times. So what can they do to
DIVORCE SETTLEMENThelp themselves?
We were left without an income when my children'sTEN WAYS TO STAY POSITIVE IN NEGATIVE
father departed to set up home elsewhere. Unable toCIRCUMSTANCES
heat the large, Victorian, stone-built, family home which
had been awarded me as part of my divorce1. Make the most of in store special offers whenever
settlement (with the encumbrance of a mortgage) Iyou can. But beware of offers that entice you to buy
used a calor gas heater in the hall in an attempt toperishables (like fruit) in greater quantities than you can
fend off the damp. To no avail! The windowsget through before they start to rot.
streamed with condensation and, in no time, the2. Use coupons for foods you know you will eat.
wallpaper was hanging from the walls of the diningAvoid the temptation of thinking you'll save money by
room.using coupons for luxury items, or foodstuffs you'll
As soon as the girls' schooling permitted, I put thenever eat.
house on the market, and had a purchaser lined up3. Use everything. Left over scraps, even peelings,
who agreed to the asking price. But this was themake nourishing soup.
1980's when gazumping was the norm. My purchasers,4. Swap items of clothing - yours and the kids - with
knowing my vulnerable position, kept me hangingfriends. That way you'll all have something 'new' to
around for months. Then they dropped the price theywear.
had offered me by more than ten per cent. With the5. Never half fill your washing machine / dishwasher. It's
vendors of the house I wanted to buy threatening tonot economical.
pull out of my agreement with them, I had no option but6. Share a bath / shower with your kids.
to accept the reduced offer.7. Try to encourage your kids to help someone worse
A BETTER PERSPECTIVE ON LIFEoff than you: the old lady down the road; the single
Nevertheless, my daughters and I look back on thatmother next door. It will change your perspective on
time with mixed feelings: part horror, part gladness. Welife and make you more positive about your own.
felt it taught us so much about what mattered, you8. Never allow yourself to become isolated. Participate
see. Gone was the lavish lifestyle of fancy restaurants,in a fund-raising event. Serve meals at the local Day
ponies and racing dinghies that we'd known with theirCentre. Volunteer to help slow-readers at your child's
father. Instead, I learned how to make a chicken lastschool. Helping others is the best way of helping
five days (I know! That's two days longer than theyourself to stay positive.
best before date, but we came to no harm). First9. Have a laugh! Laughter is the best remedy for any
roasted, then stir-fried, then made into a pie which diddire situation. If you can't afford to go out to meet up
us two days, and finally simmered for stock and soup,with friends, ask them round to your house. Watch a
we considered ourselves well fed. I learned, too, thatComedy DVD or film. Better still, push back the
the butcher's trimmings from gammon joints and suchfurniture, and do Pilates with two or three friends.
like can be bought cheaply over the counter and were10. Remember, bodies generate heat. Try to use one
useful to supplement the meagre filling for the chickenroom for all events - eating, homework, computer, TV,
pie.ironing.
Christmas found us making sweets for presents,